What does it mean to have Self-Value?
Self-value can also be described as self-worth. When we have a high level of self-value, we have a favorable opinion of ourselves (not in an egotistical way but in a way that is grounded and present). When we have unshakable faith in ourselves and our abilities, we easily follow through with our goals and desires. When we have self-value, we get things done. Having a high degree of self–value means feeling worthy of all the good things life has to offer.
A Story of Value
A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20 bill.
In the room of 200, he asked, “who would like this $20 bill?” Hands started going up.
He said, “I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this.” He proceeded to crumple the dollar bill up.
He then asked, “Who still wants it?” Still the hands were up in the air.
“Well,” he replied, “What if I do this?” And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it onto the floor with his shoe.
He picked it up, now all crumpled and dirty. “Now who still wants it?” Still the hands went into the air.
“My friends”, he said, “you have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.
You are special – Don’t ever forget it!” (Huge thanks to Matt Wingett for this story)
Self-value Quote
“Our self-respect tracks our choices.
Every time we act in harmony with our authentic self
and our heart, we earn our respect.
It is that simple.
Every choice matters.”
Dan Coppersmith
Increasing Self-Value
Here are some helpful tips to begin to enhance your self-value:
Avoid comparing yourself with others, accept your differences – if we were all the same the world would be a very boring place.- Become aware and mindful of your inner critic and make friends with it – it is after-all just trying to protect you and keep you safe.
- Pause for a moment or two, breathe and think about the good things in your life, your friends, the work you do, the positive effects you have on others.
- Do the right thing, trust and follow both your heart and gut-instincts.
- Understand what drives your perfectionism – sometimes it is a fear of criticism.
- Handle mistakes and failures in a more positive way – look for the gift or the learning in the situation.
- Be kinder and more compassionate towards yourself and other people.
- Take a risk and do something new.
- Spend more time with uplifting and supportive people (and less time with negative and critical people).
Developing Self-Value with Meditation
There are many things you can do to boost your own self-value, one of these methods is meditation. When we meditate, we develop an ability to let go. We begin to harness our thoughts and feelings and keep them in perspective. We can begin to learn to observe and respond instead of reacting or actively participating in every experience that comes to us or pops into our heads. In other words, according to Puddicombe, 2015: we “loosen the grip we have on our sense of self”.
Through meditation, we begin to gain an ability to become mindful and aware of our inner experiences without identifying with them. We can learn to let our thoughts pass by without judgment or feeling a strong emotional response.
Contact
Call us by phone on Ph: 087 149 2338 or from the UK on Ph: 07857 369619 or contact us by email if you’d like help increasing your self-value consider a personal, private consultation with us or join us for a transformational retreat in Cork, Ireland either in February 2019 or also in April 2019.
Final Quote
By Aberjhani:
“Dare to love yourself
as if you were a rainbow
with gold at both ends.”
My mind wouldn’t stop. Instead of slowing down it became incredibly active, going 90-to-the-dozen! I’d have a shopping list of things come up in my mind, all sorts of random ridiculous thoughts. I would get so frustrated. The exact opposite of what I was attempting to achieve (sigh).
Better memory, and an enhanced ability to process information and solve problems
In his book, the 
When we start to become aware of this outdated programming we are able to begin to make changes. Firstly we can stop expecting others to make us happy – that’s not their job. We can also release the expectation of others being like us. In addition we get help to release the belief (and burden) that others should be the primary source of love in our lives. As we make changes and begin to focus on our inner world, we can start to fill our own love tank and take responsibility for our own happiness and well-being. The more we do this, the better we will feel.
If you’d like to learn to fill your own love tank or explore any of the themes raised in this blog regarding loving yourself and others – feel free to 
we argue, we rarely take the time to discover what is on the other persons’ map. We generally spend all our effort and energy defending our map, trying our best to convince the other person that our map is ‘right’. We never take a step back to look at their map. If we did, we’d discover that – surprisingly – we both want the same thing.
So in any disagreement it’s helpful to stay curious to what is on the other persons’ map. We then have a few opportunities:
